Admittedly and reluctantly, I recently paid money to see the Poltergeist remake. As with every movie (remake or not), I try to approach the viewing of said movie with an open mind, hoping that the filmmakers and producers make an honest attempt to give the public a worthwhile film experience. This should be expected even more so, if you are remaking what can be universally considered a classic. Let me say that it has been quite a few years since I have sat and watched the original Poltergeist movie. But having seen it so many times in the past, I am confident that I can make a fair assessment of this remake against the original film. Again, I watched this remake with an open mind and not thinking too much about the original, which proved to be more difficult than I had expected.
Like so many contemporary remakes, this new Poltergeist film most definitely fell flat. As you see in a lot of modern-day horror films, the spooks and scares all come from the same well (possibly containing a stringy haired creepy ghost girl). These gags are all versions/variations on things that have been done over and over, in the far and recent past, coupled with that tinge of our technological present that can really take one out of the experience.
The problem with this modern take on the Poltergeist story was that it seemed rushed and did not take the right steps to build the creepy vibe that the original took the time to do, as well it did not focus on the true confusion and peril of the situation that this family found themselves. Their resolution came without much hair pulling so present in the original production. The ghostly experiences were isolated for the most part to the children, and went from quirky parlour tricks to otherworldly portal in no time at all. Take out the added creepiness of a Zelda Rubinstein-esque caliber actor and you have what I am now realizing is a gentrification of Hollywood storytelling.
The theater was filled with Tweens who would (unfortunately) have no idea what real moviemaking looked like if it swooped down and shit in their eye. This being no fault of their own and due to the aforementioned gentrification process that Hollywood is proceeding with is unfortunate, as most everyone in the theater, except for me, jumped multiple times at the sorry excuses masquerading as scares. If you want to see a truly good movie about an otherworldly ghostly forces that terrorizes a mild-mannered suburban family, do yourself a favor and find the original 1982 release of the Tobe Hooper directed Poltergeist. It’s a truly scary movie, who’s cinematography alone is creepy enough to hold anyone’s attention. This remake however isn’t even worth a watch when you’re hungover on a Sunday and the only other thing on is golf.
Reviewed by FD contributor: Mike Gutwoski